What Happened Yesterday – Parenting Through Anxiety

You ever have one of those days where you just nail everything?

Due to all my mental health issues, one of those days hadn’t happened in a very long time – I often lose my shit over something, but 5 major things happened yesterday that old me would have had major meltdowns over.

1. Boe refused to leave me to go to the Childminder. To the point where he was sobbing so much he couldn’t breathe. Normally, old me would have been freaking out about the fact that our routine would be broken, and I’d actually have a major panic attack over plans not being stuck to and I’d be having anxiety attacks about not being able to cope and Mr Plinky would have probably ended up having to either take the day off or work from home. But yesterday… When my little baby melted in my arms, held me tight and sobbed, those normal feelings and worries didn’t appear. Those hugs literally sang to my heart and told me what to do.

2. I managed to have a shower whilst it was just Boe and I in the house. I’ve NEVER been able to do that since he was born – I’ve only ever showered while someone else was there to watch over him, even when he was a newborn. But I somehow ignored the usual worries of him climbing the floor to ceiling expedit, or him pulling his kitchen over and I got in the shower. Before I knew it, shower was done, and I went to check on Boe and he was happily playing away with his playdoh. I even managed to get dressed and do my hair ?

3. I did some baking! Whilst Boe was in the lounge! I’d done baking in the early days with only Boe and I in the house, but that was when he still took naps. Other times I’ve only managed to do baking when he’s at the Childminders or if someone else was home with us. But yesterday I managed to make cheesy peeps. He was quite happy watching Paddington, so I was able to duck out into the kitchen for half an hour!

Suggested post: cheesy peeps

4. I made dinner. I actually made dinner with only Boe and I in the house! I’d not done this since Boe gave up his naps before he was 1. The last meal I made from scratch on a mamaBoe day was the spaghetti bolognese from Annabel Karmel’s Complete Baby and Toddler Meal Planner 2 food book in our early days of babyled weaning. (This book was sooo useful during our early days – we just didn’t puree everything, but the recipes were really tasty! The book has been updated since our adventures, and you can find it HERE.)

5. Boe decided that he wanted to be in the kitchen with me mid-cooking, so I let him. With the old kitchen I’d have been having major anxiety attacks over him even stepping foot in that room with the oven and hob on, but we just embraced the challenge! And to my surprise, we had a ball! We got Alexa to play the Trolls soundtrack and we sang and cooked and Boe played in the sink ? it was amazing! I even remained calm and managed to laugh it off when Boe took the tap out of its holder and water shot all over the place ? I’d have totally lost my shit in the old kitchen through panicking at all the dangers, resulting in me screeching at him to get out of the kitchen before he kills himself!

So yesterday was a GREAT day!

Maybe it was just pure luck? Or maybe it’s because of the new kitchen? Or maybe it’s the work of the crystals? Or maybe it’s because slowly but surely I’m learning how to manage my anxieties since starting CBT?

Either way, it’s been a LONG time since Boe and I had such a relaxing and lovely day!

Our bond is definitely still in tact ?

Plinky xx

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